“the Candadians are coming,” Rachel said. She suggested how we’d divvy up the transportation of people. The task highlighted just how poor LA’s local transit infrastructure is compared to any other city of size elsewhere. An Uber from LAX to the San Gabriel Valley would easily run about $150. Rachel insisted we play the part of good hosts. She took Carl, Shawn, and Shelly, and I had Bryan—he decided to stay in Glendale for some reason. It was nowhere near the venue for the conference we were all attending.
I scooped Bryan up from the Hell-AX and proceeded to sit on the 110 northbound, inching along in the middle of rush-hour traffic. I didn’t know much about Bryan, aside from our discussions online and so I figured I’d get rolling with the questions. “So Bryan, what—”
And Bryan matter of factly says “You know, the great thing about the States is all the Cheesecake Factories yah all have here. We have one in Ontario, yah know. One. You figure with a place so amazing they’d be on every block…I guess we’re all gonna go to the Cheesecake factory tomorrow or Friday, yah?” I’m a pretentious goober and not really a chain-going type of person; the idea of the Cheesecake Factory and its law-volume thick menu is one of the only things to ever cause me a headache.
I sigh and say, “Sure thing, man.” Bryan lets out a slow exhale, finding comfort in my confirmation. “What do you like to do when you’re not working?” I ask him. He says, “Oh, gosh. I like sex. A lot. I like to have a lot of sex with women. So that’s how I spend a lot of my free time. I have girlfriends around here and there.” I could feel my eyes widen. “What a bizarre response,” I thought. I can appreciate his blunt and forward response. It’s the same energy as when you ask someone what they’re looking forward to on a date, and your date replies, “The love of my life.” Just chill out, people. Geez.
“You know, currency is a lie. Right?” Bryan goes on. It’s controlled by the real power. This is why you should get into Crypto. Do you have any Crypto?” He probes me. I tell him I do. “Oh, that’s great! You’re going to be a billionaire you hold onto that stuff. We all are. It was crushing some years later to hear that much of his holdings were wiped out when FTX crashed.
Bryan, to me, didn’t seem much to look at but while he was in town, he managed to shag Rachel’s co-worker. I raised an eyebrow at that, and apparently, he had the right words, the confidence, and certainly the audacity (if not a good taste in food).